“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of those depths.” – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
We have all faced the struggles of defeat, but it is how we deal with a defeat that will define us in the end and how we will be remembered.
Accepting moments as they happen and as they are will lead to your own self-liberation and a path towards something better. You should always bear in mind that there is a reason behind everything. Although we can’t control the obstacles that are put in front of us, we can, however, control how we react to them.
Everyone falls down once in a while. We shouldn’t let defeat; failure or making mistakes overcome us because some things are just meant to be. While you chase your dreams, you must always remember you will incur defeat and loss along the way.
You should not stop continuing your strive for your passion. Life is never constant; you must always remember that you can overcome every defeat and obstacles in your path. Obstacles in life shouldn’t make you weak instead make you strong enough. It is the journey that makes the destination worthwhile.
As Robert Frost says:
I took the one less travelled by / and that has made all the difference.
You must always remember that what is easy is not achieving it, struggles provide you with the better taste of success.
Discussed below are 5 action steps that can help you raise from defeat
#1 CHOOSE YOUR GOAL
Setting up a goal is the most important thing for a person to do. If you do not know what you want to achieve, you will naturally lose all your focus and be disillusioned. That would ultimately do not do any good to you. You must thereby choose a goal and be committed towards it.
Every time you fail in your job, you should be more committed and more focused towards it.
Always remember that every obstacle in your path is a reminder for you to go back and reignite that spark when you first began your journey. You should not lose your focus as you won’t ever achieve success in that case.
#2 BE ORGANISED
Setting a timeframe on your goals makes you accountable and makes you push that a little bit harder each time. You should be very clear about what you want to achieve and thus your goals becomes realistic.
You know what to do and in which way. Suppose you want to be a traveller and do not know where to start your journey from, you would never be a traveller but a wanderer.
You must sort out the places you want to travel first and then you must figure out how to reach the place easily. You must have a proper geographical knowledge about the place so that you do not face insanely adverse situation there.
#3 SILENCE THE HATERS
As we all know “haters’ gonna hate and people gonna judge”; so you must not worry what others say you. You must always focus on your work and your goal and not listen to anything that people tells you.
At the end of the day, what you achieve is of sole importance not what people decide. You are your own guru and your own guide. Work hard, follow your instincts and follow your goals. Your haters will be silenced anyway.
#4 FIND SUPPORT
When your confidence is shaken up, you usually want to be isolated. Also, if you are around many people, they would comment on you or judge you. Certain people would like to impose all their thoughts on you.
You need to find people who are in the same boat as yourself. It is important to be able to relate to somebody else and being able to experience the same things together will help you pull through the tough times and reach your goals.
It’s important to separate yourself from the people who have a negative impact on your life, and you need to get out of the situation. You must surround yourself with positivity and people who ignite positivity.
Always remember the age old saying that an active mind, leads to a positive life.
#5 LEARN TO BE PATIENT
“Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting” – Joyce Meyer
To adapt to an unexpected defeat, treat it as a temporary process because it becomes easier to handle. There is no finish line to failure and see it as a continuing process where you can grow. You may think that continuing on is hopeless, but patience teaches one to act differently and by not being bitter.
If you fail, don’t be discouraged to get back up, dust yourself off and try again. Thomas Edison didn’t invent the light bulb overnight; it took him thousands of attempts to perfect.
Always believe that you will rise again because the fruits of your labour don’t always become evident but more that your patience is required. Nurture your dreams with patience and get ready to face the brighter side of the world.
Do not burden your shoulder with the massive load of failure. Defeat it is just a small thing, so let go. Failure offers you a new perspective and a new breath in a lie.
Let me take you back to your childhood memories and narrate a beautiful tale which will prove that failure is the pillar of success.
Once there was a brave king Vikram. Once, he had to combat against a large army with just a few soldiers, and he was defeated. He had to run for his life. Vikram took refuge in a forest cave. He was very depressed and upset. He did not feel courageous anymore. He also never left the cave as he lacked the mental urge to do so. He kept blankly gazing at the ceiling of the cave and when an interesting scene captured his attention. A little spider was trying to weave the web across the cave ceiling.
As the spider crawled up, a thread of the web broke, and the spider fell down. He again crawled up the cave wall, but the web broke and brought him back to the initial position. He tried to climb again and again but failed. Even then the spider did not give up. Finally, the spider successfully climbed up the cave wall and completed the web. This incident inspired the valorous king. He began to think that if a small spider can face failure so bravely, he should not give up after his first defeat. He should try again and may achieve victory.
This thought gave strength and courage to the defeated king. Vikram left the cave and got out of the jungle. He collected his brave soldiers who fought gallantly against a large army. He was defeated again. But, this time he did not run away. He kept on trying until he achieved victory and regained his lost kingdom. A small spider taught a great lesson to the king.
Always remember that perseverance paves the way to success. So enjoy your failure and achieve your success.
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