Is Your Boyfriend  a Control Freak ?

The line between the controlling boyfriend and loving boyfriend can be very thin. Sometimes it may seem like things that he does are out of love. But other times you may question what his intentions are. If you are already questioning his intentions, you may already be in a controlling relationship.

Controlling boyfriends tend to be very insecure. They may have had trouble in the past with relationships. They maybe verbally controlling or physically controlling.
It is fairly easy to tell when a boyfriend is physically trying to control you; however, it is much harder to tell when one is trying to emotionally control you. It may seem like he just cares a lot. It might seem like he just needs a little bit more attention. It can be sweet at first to be with a boyfriend that needs you so much but this is not a relationship that can stay strong over time. Emotionally controlling boyfriends can be very difficult to deal with and they may cause just as much harm is a physically controlling one.

If you have been questioning whether your boyfriend is controlling or whether he is just showing that he cares, here are a few ways that you can tell the difference.

#1 He’s condescending

He may put you down when you do things. He might find mistakes in everything you do. He may try to make it seem like he just wants to help you do better but what he’s really doing is telling you that you’re wrong. He questions your decisions and he even questions your motivations. This may be very subtle at first but eventually you’ll start to lose confidence and question yourself.

#2 He insists on knowing everything about you

If he finds out about something that you’ve done or something that has happened in your past that you haven’t told him, he gets very angry. He insists that you tell him all of your passwords to your social media accounts and your email and he will check them regularly. He needs to know all the details of your life whether it’s from today or from your past. When you don’t share these things with him he will act like he is very hurt. He will assume that you are trying to hide something from him.

#3 He doesn’t like you to go out without him

If you’re going out, he wants to go with you, even if it’s a girl’s night out. He doesn’t trust your friends and he thinks that they will get you in trouble. He’ll escort you to the store, to the gym, to the library, and anywhere else you go. He may use the excuse of just being concerned about your well-being or just wanting to spend time with you but this is a controlling move that you should be wary of.

#4 He tries to make your decisions for you

At first it may seem like he’s just being chivalrous. After a while though, he will try to make more and more decisions in your life. When you do try to make your own decisions, he’ll make it seem that you are making the wrong ones. He will try to make you think that he makes better decisions then you do and you should probably just leave the decision-making up to him.

#5 He wants you to be in constant contact with him

Even at points where you do have to do things by yourself, like when you go to work, he wants you to be in contact with him. This might mean that he insists that you keep your cell phone on or that you are available for text messaging at any time. When you don’t respond immediately to his text messages he will get angry and make it seem like he’s just concerned for your well-being.

#6 He uses emotional manipulation

When you do try to stand up for yourself when you disagree with him, he will make it seem like you were doing something that is extremely hurtful. He may even cry. He may bring up events from the past. He uses these tactics to make you feel bad and to make you question yourself.

#7 He’s jealous of everyone

Every other guy in your life will automatically be considered competition by him. He will think that every guy you know that is not a family member is out to still you away from him. He will say that he doesn’t trust them, but really he doesn’t trust you. He thinks that you are always looking for something better. He’s even jealous of people that are not other guys like your friends and your family members. He wants to be the most important person in your life at all times.

#8 It’s never his fault

When he makes a mistake or when something happens to him, it is never his fault. There is always a reason or an excuse for things. If he pushed you, it is your fault that you made him mad. If he loses his job, it is his bosses fault because he didn’t give him the right information or it wasn’t his job. There’s always a reason for his mistakes. But there are no excuses for your mistakes. Pressing the matter and trying to get him to be accountable for his mistakes will result in tears or he will bring up past arguments to put the attention back on you.